Paavo languished on his couch. He hated being sick. It made him feel unproductive. He swallowed painfully and shifted achily. How awful this was. He stared up at the ceiling and meditated on his sickness. He must've gotten sick from the machine shop. That's the only place he's at regularly.

His violence flared up. He wished he could find the man responsible for introducing the sickness and punch him in the face. He noted this thought, let it pass by like a cloud, or maybe like a fish, and then re-suppressed his violence before he got angry and wasted energy. He had no time for negative emotions right now. He had to heal. As a matter of fact, he had no time for negative emotions even when he wasn't sick. He didn't like getting violent. Such was the way of it.

He shifted again on his couch, drawing his blankets up to his face. Maybe it'd be wise to nap. He hated being sick. It messed with his painstakingly maintained sleep schedule. But sleeping would temporarily numb the pain of his throat. He closed his eyes...

He began to dream of endless, unbroken, untainted forests and lakes. Finally there were no people and no buildings anywhere. He glided quickly and effortlessly through the green splendor. He shifted upwards and settled weightlessly atop a tree overlooking a lake as clear as glass. He stared down, trying to see if he could find his own reflection.

The water rippled and distorted the reflections, making it a challenge to find himself. He identified the tree he was resting on. With his gaze he traced the edge of the shadowy shape to the top and saw not a man but a bird. Was that him? Was he a bird? He opened his mouth and out came the shriek of an osprey.

Suddenly the lake disappeared. Paavo awoke, violently coughing. In protest, he brought down his fist against the cushions of the couch. Finally after a good ten seconds the coughing subsided. He breathed deep and caught his breath.

He hated being sick. He swallowed painfully again. It felt as if his voice box had been scribbled all over. He thought that if he tried to speak, his voice might sound like an osprey's.

---


By Adaline Guerra